Transformational Teachings from Counselor Jane Ilene Cohen

“With you it’s more of a male-female dynamic. You easily gain mastery in the male arena. You’re good at that. What you are not good at doing is in the female arena, which is being present, being seen, being vulnerable, being gotten to, being related to, being touched, inter-meshing with other people, mixing it up. You’ve been living in a false world with a false self, and having false things that give you false pleasure. In other words, the real things that really matter to you are what you feel deeply sad about, because you don’t think you can possibly have them because of limiting decisions you have made.”

“The point is a person who identifies him/herself as a victim, is never a victim in reality. A victim is someone who is not taking responsibility for how they are using their power. They are never powerless. The story is that you are powerless, and that people or circumstances are controlling you. But the truth is you use being a victim and martyr to control everybody else around you. ..The main point here is that in the events you described, you were using your power very actively. There is nothing powerless about you. You are out there every day, every moment, being in your power. And what I’m trying to get you to do is start getting conscious of how you are using it.”

“In order to be in the present moment, self-interest is a crucial element. If you’re not connected to what matters to you, personally, and if you’re not following that path of what really matters to you in every moment… It’s crucially important. That’s how you define reality.”