Transformational Teachings from Counselor Jane Ilene Cohen

Regardless of the external circumstances, being a victim has to do with attitude and interpretation.

When a person makes a limiting decision* that they can’t trust their own perception of reality, it makes them overly dependent on how other people respond to them and define reality. It often, also, makes them overly dependent on people they consider authority figures…

There is a difference between someone who is needy and trying to use you to make up for a lack in themselves — and someone who is coming from wholeness and love, and from really enjoying you. When a person is needy, they don’t have the channels open to receive what it is they need. You then become a symbol to them of what they need, rather than who you really are.

as your desire to evolve as a soul gets stronger and stronger, the defense system gets more and more in the way…

If you’re feeling something along the lines of life can’t work, or it’s not working, or it’s not going to work, then you know it’s got to be out of reality…

It’s just a huge burden. And if the man doesn’t do those things a man is supposed to do, he’s not considered a man, and he doesn’t feel good about himself.

The group is a different kind of social situation, in which instead of people going along with your defense systems or skirting around them, they are putting in the picture their own experience…

We think that it’s our manipulations and our fudgings and our organizing things this way and that way, from our limited perspective, that is somehow making life work.

there’s an energetic goal of feeling a certain way, and then that becomes symbolic for you getting something. But it is not the real thing.

…holding in place a whole frame-of-reference that you’re sure is true and not allowing a space to actually find out what is true.