The Love behind the Pain
Transcript Excerpts of Jane’s Teachings
during a “Shifting into Your New Consciousness” group 7-2-09
(Clients’ names are changed to protect their privacy)
(Melanie kept defending herself about why she got angry at Nancy when Nancy asked her about her daughter’s suicide. Melanie kept bringing up the issue over and over again.)
(To Melanie) “I think you’re in conflict about talking about your daughter’s suicide, at least partially because of the issue of vulnerability. What happens when you talk about this is it brings up vulnerability in you. It’s a deeply vulnerable thing. So now when you’re bringing it up, and when you were talking about it earlier, you got very vulnerable, which means you get soft. You get into a state in which people can love you. You’re very present. It’s beautiful when you get so vulnerable like that. But you have a judgment against being vulnerable. Unfortunately vulnerability comes up only in areas that are very painful for you. But evidently those are the areas that bring you into vulnerability, because being vulnerable for you is very difficult and you won’t get into it unless you are forced. But that’s not the only kind of thing that can bring up vulnerability. You don’t have to be in pain in order to be vulnerable. Vulnerability really has to do with love. And actually the bottommost truth about the painful areas we’ve been talking about has to do with love. Love is what is causing the vulnerability, because you no doubt loved your daughter and love your son. And my guess is you keep bringing the issue up because you have a need to be vulnerable, because you need to be connected, because that’s how you can be loved. My guess is that there is something in you that wants to bring the vulnerability out in you, because that’s the only way you can not be alone. Right now you’re alone, totally alone, because you refuse to be vulnerable. And you don’t want to be alone. And so there is something in you that is aching to be vulnerable with other people.”
